Standard 90s action comedy elevated by Jackie Chan and brought down by a really bad script. The 90s-level casual racism is bad enough but the ridiculousness of the set up – the FBI absolutely refusing to work with the Chinese Authorities in any way, Chan never explaining anything that could instead be solved by a 5 minute fight sequence, why does the FBI keep believing the kidnapper when he just blew a bunch if guys up at the first drop, etc etc, also why does Jackie vouch for Tucker when all Tucker has done is lie to and obstruct him – I guess to keep the movie going. Yay. Tucker teaching Chan how to say “y’all” is a war crime against Texans. Just amazing that these movies could rank so low for me with an established love of Jackie Chan. And it’s not even like Tucker is bad in these things – the scrips are just that terrible!
#249: The Ugly Stepsister (2025)
Cinderella is really a pretty terrible story when you think about it – but that insight doesn’t really support a film, it turns out. The really villain is, of course, the male-dominated aristocracy, as all of the characters (other than the younger stepsister) come out looking pretty bad but it’s really because they are acting out of extreme need. The story goes exactly where you expect it to, although that doesn’t make the cringier moments any easier to take. The concept really wasn’t bad but the movie was more concerned with showing grime and gore (just guess how the stepsister gets that slipper to fit!) than telling an interesting and coherent tale.
#248: Captain America: Brave New World (2025)#
My tolerance for storylines involving morally compromised presidents is……extremely low right now. Interesting (“interesting”) choice that the promos featured red hulk everywhere when the movie itself played that as a big mystery – I wonder what it would’ve played like as a surprise. Otherwise, a tragic waste of Giancarlo Esposito in what feels like rolling out a bunch of C-team characters. Plot wise, the Leader absolutely had no reason whatsoever to have surrendered (or killed the army guy to keep him from telling Sam about the pills, which he figured out himself in literally the next scene and didn’t matter anyway) but whatever.
#247: Hermana Muerte (Sister Death) (2023)
Frankly pretty boring. Not very spooky at all, most everything is just nightmares that are obviously nightmares. The one somewhat innovative thing they did (events in flashbacks changing and having concurrent present-day effects) was not used in a remotely interesting way. I mean, I can think up more interesting movie ideas right now just sitting here – nightmares twisting reality, attempts at lucid dreaming, interactions between multiple people with the ability having conflicting dreams, etc etc, but here it appears to just be helping her “solve” the “mystery.” Avoid.
#246: Peninsula (2020)
Disappointing “sequel” to the interesting and innovating Train to Busan which has virtually nothing to do with the original. This is more of a zombie heist with – get this totally original idea – the survivors being worse than the zombies. Nothing new or particularly well done, although one good sequence where night-blind zombies are (deliberately) distracted by a flashing noisy radio controlled toy car. Lots of cars are lying around still in good shape and full of gas years after after the zombie apocalypse. All of my other favorite tropes too – magic electricity, imperiled kids (who do NOT act like kids growing up in a fricking apocalypse), one dude who can outfight an entire platoon of actual soldiers, etc.
Moving on from the ones that made me angry to the ones that just made me sad. Contrary to the popular aphorism, it’s much worse when I’m mad than when I’m disappointed.
#256: Venom: The Last Dance (2024)
I enjoyed the prior installments mostly for the special chemistry between Eddie and Venom and Hardy’s batshit-crazy commitment to the bit, but this one is completely off the rails. The main plot is a 10 year old’s demented scribbling, none of it makes any sense, and they pad it out with a bunch of garbage like Mrs Chen just so happening to be in Vegas and winning big because why not. And Venom conveniently forgets about the main plot when they want a fight scene. Randoms just walking around Area 51 – which should be substantially MORE secure given the situation posited by this movie – with no problem. No sense of continuity or interest at all. Very disappointing.
#255: Fountain of Youth (2025)
Stupid. The “rules” for the fountain are stupid and make no sense, the characters are stupid and never act like actual people, the very idea that there was a secret society (?) trying to stop people from finding the fountain was stupid (although Tucci getting his $$ for probably 3 hours of work was very smart). The whole set up was stupid? Why would a bunch of famous renessaince artists know about this and how to find clues and then leading other people to in the future to find them? How could ancient egytptians have built all these intricate traps? Stupid stupid stupid stupid.
#254: News From Home (1977)
Oh. My. Lord. The ultimate in “experimental film” that is really just navel gazing. Only this high on the list because the scenes of 1977 New York City are pretty interesting. But to say that nothing happens is a drastic exaggeration of the level of activity and plot in this “movie.” The director reads a series of letters her mother sent her while she was away in New York on top of various “daily life” scenes. I truly think that people say that this is good just because they want to seem deep and thoughtful. Similar to how people say they liked Peter Hujar’s Day. Suuuuure you did, buddy. Sure you did.
#253: Theatre of Blood (1973)
Pretty schlocky. Vincent hams it up pretty hard but ultimately there is really nothing to this beyond the basic premise of “jilted actor goes after the awards committee that denied his greatness.” I cannot believe that the movie reqlly thought it was going to surprise us with the obvious “reveal” that his main flunky was his daughter in a terrible, terrible disguise.
#252: Last Days (2025)
It’s possible that there is a good movie here – a good kid feeling lost is recruited into a cult to find purpose – but this movie isn’t it. Everything is taken at face value and just presented as fact with no further examination. And it’s filmed as some kind of thriller when it’s really a tragedy of a deranged man who thinks he knows better than anyone else meeting his expected end.
#251: The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim (2024)
Not an animation style that I appreciate, but the bigger problem was t hat the animation was more realistic than the ridiculous motivations and terrible war tactics. So many things happen just to happen, outside of any rational reason aside from something thinking “huh huh that would be coooollll.” Watched this during a rare break at Sundance, because that’s what we do when we take a break from watching movies – we watch more movies.
I don’t know about you, but personally. Find this less creepy than the picture of Jack Nicholson smiling
So this is the same category as the prior one, but while I very much did not like these films, they didn’t offend my delicate sensibilities like the prior 5 did.
#261: Rush Hour 2 (2001)
The lessons that they learned from the first one were apparently to cut down on any kind of cultural sensitivity or understanding and that having any kind of decent script was optional at best. And what the hell kind of Jackie Chan movie has such limited practical effects? The above fight scene wasn’t bad, but it still relied on a bunch of bad homophobic “humor.”
Ok, so this one pissed me off a little bit too I guess.
#260: By Design (2025)
One of the cool things about Sundance is that you generally know extremely little about the movies you’re going to see. Well beyond not having seen a trailer, you generally know nothing behind one still image, director and star names, and 1-2 sentences of description. Sometimes this results in the joy of a Ghost Story or The Guest but then sometimes the movie about a person who becomes a chair which makes her much more popular turns out to be some sort of freakish art piece with no apparent point.
#259: V/H/S Halloween (2025)
I don’t know why I keep watching these. Some of the ideas sounded good here – developing a new soda that has the unfortunate side effect of demonic possession, for example – but the execution was bland and tacky at the same time. The one semi-interesting thing was the freakish candy thing shown above with Kirsten Schaal’s voice (presumably not, but it sure sounded like her), although even that actual segment was dull and uninventive aside from the thing.
#258: Peter Hujar’s Day (2025)
Sometimes what is sold as a film about two people talking about random bullshit is a film about two people talking about random bullshit. I guess some of the stories were interesting? Only this high due to residual affection for Ben Whishaw.
#257: Roma (2018)
Boring misery porn. I had to try three times to watch this as I kept falling asleep trying to get through it. Hard to understand why people thought this was good. Maybe the pretentious black and white cinemotography? I dunno why some people like it but it sure as heck wasn’t for me.
There were blessedly few truly terrible films in 2025. Well, films that I saw anyway, I’m sure there was a lot of crap out there as usual, but I fortunately didn’t see much of it – no Electric State or Snow White for your boy. And a lot of the truly terrible dreck I can blame other people (sometimes, but not always, Toby) for having seen. And that has to count for something, right? Right?
#266: War of the Worlds (2025)
I am reluctant to even call this **** a movie, as the majority is just Ice Cube making ridiculous reactions to his computer screen, Amazon sponcon (at one point an Amazon delivery driver has to use a drone to deliver an Amazon gift card to bribe a homeless person to….no. Just no.), and bad cell phone videos of other actors driving or running or screaming. And of course, dear merciful lord, the “plot.” The aliens want our precious data, see. We were such fools, storing all of our data in the same place and…..enough. Some team of imbeciles thought that this would be sufficient as an entertainment product, and I guess they got me because like a fool I watched it. Shame on us both.
#265: Y2K (2024)
The worst thing that I can say about this movie is that I had to really think about whether or not it was worse than War of the Worlds. Obviously meant to be tongue-in-cheek, this is instead a terrible cheap-ass shlockfest with ridiculous characters, no real plot, and no reason to exist. The one interesting character is killed 20 minutes into the thing and in a very stupid way to boot. Avoid.
#264: Star Trek: Section 31
Boring generic-ass movie gets a boring generic-ass picture.
Just terrible. Shame on all of them. I don’t care if Michelle Yeoh opted out of her contract for a series after winning the Oscar, she deserved better than this garbage, as did all of the rest of us. Not only is the bad guy obvious and the redemption arc overbearing, everything else is telegraphed from miles away too – gee, I wonder if the cyborg is going to have his systems hacked? I wonder who is behind the mysterious attacks – surely not the kid we saw at the beginning of the movie!
Oh and our hero has literally committed large-scale genocide, but it’s cool, she’s with us now.
Ugh.
#263: Omaha (2025)
Don’t worry, only 3 of the beings in this car will be left behind forever before the end of the movie!
Look, I am guessing that the writer/director of this movie had some pretty crappy things happen to them that led to writing this, but putting it all on screen is just abusive. This is just a mean-spirited movie. And not well made either – you really know where this is going all along, especially after he gives away Rex without even letting the kids say goodbye.
Ugh, now I’m upset that I even had to think about it again.
#262: Toni Erdmann (2016)
What in the holy ****ing hell was that crap???
An asshole comes barging into his (rightfully) estranged daughter’s life, refuses to butt out or go away, and ultimately causes a total breakdown, but I guess it’s played for laughs like she just needs to loosen up?
Also, it’s freaking 2 hours and 45 minutes long and nothing freaking happens for the vast majority of it, other than occasionally this asshole barges in and makes an idiot of himself while the movie pretends that people think he’s interesting or charming or god only knows what.
Normally when a movie receives critical acclaim and I don’t like it, I assume it’s just not on my wavelength or different cultural customs or something, but this garbage was on the NYT Top 100 of the quarter-century and I assume that placement was a convoluted prank of some kind or a cry for help or something because this suuuuuuuuuucks.
Yes, it’s once again that glorious time my friends. The dream we all dream of – boy vs girl in the World Series of love. No, wait, scratch that. It’s movie rating time! Woooo! Party party party! Fireworks! Explosions! Excitement!
As has become tradition, before we just jump into the rankings of these 266 fine films, we will start with a little amuse bouche of the best TV shows I watched in 2025. That’s right, you get extra bonus Tom opinions! You lucky little scamps, you. Just be thankful that I don’t (yet) rank all the TV shows I saw in a year!
There was a ton of good TV this year! I know this must be shocking to all of you, but it’s like we’re living in a golden age of television or something. I just coined that, anyone who uses it owes me money now.
Honorable Mentions
In making this list I went through and put down all the stuff that I watched this year that I thought might be good enough to make the list, and it was twice as many as I was willing to rank. So the next 10, in alpha order:
The Agency s1
The Bear s4
Black Doves s1
Day of the Jackel s1
Death by Lightning
The Gentlemen s1
Ludwig
The Recruit s1
The Residence
Task s1
Top Ten
In countdown order, DUH. All season 1 unless otherwise noted.
10. Dept. Q
Good solid mystery, I love a misanthropic detective (see: House), and Akram is the second-best character find of 2025.
9. Murderbot
A solid translation of one of my favorite book series to television. Even if you didn’t like this though you should still try to books, which have more of a focus just on Murderbot and its interiority and less as an ensamble.
8. Alien: Earth
Too much Peter Pan and the season finale was pretty bad, but everything else was kinda great. I also love a quality horror series (see: the long-forgotten by everyone else Exorcist tv series)
7. Slow Horses s5
To quote myself from last year, “they keep making these and I’ll keep ranking them.” The most reliable franchise on TV. I am vastly enjoying reading the books also.
6. Peacemaker s2
Not as transcendant as the first one but still great.
5. The Studio
I’d like to thank Sal Saperstein. The Globes episodes alone were enough to get this on the list, but the rest was great too.
4. Adolescence
Yikes
3. The Pitt
I had no idea how much a I missed a standard-ish procedural! And of course Dr. Robbie is our daddy. But the best character find of 2025 is clearly Dr. Mel King, and if anything bad ever happens to her I will storm the ramparts.
2. Severance s2
More Britt! So much more Britt! And some actual answers while still leaving plenty of compelling mystery! And, I mean:
1. Andor s2
As though there was any other possible choice. If you need me to tell you that this was great and why then you’ve already lost.
Up Next: The Rankings Begin!
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I have recently undertaken to finish watching everything in the NYT list of the top 100 movies from the first 25 (26 actually since they start with 2000) years of the 21st century. I’ve gotten through 99 of them (apologies to #100 Superbad) and figured what the heck, why not make my own list.
Notwithstanding my normal inclination toward ranking things, these are presented in alphabetical order. Are there some I like more than others? Duh, of course, but that’s not the point for today.
There are 33 films on my list, a number carefully chosen because that was a cut-off point that I was comfortable with. #34 – Almost Famous was just under what felt like a good line.
So with no further ado:
Barbarian (2022)
Masterful setup to the ultimate crazy-go-nuts movie, complete with the shocking turn in the middle to introduce Justin Long’s character. I ended up laughing at the audacity and the brazen way they pulled it off.
Bo Burnham Inside (2021)
For my money, the definitive movie about the non- medical aspects of the COVID-19 period. And also hugely goddamn funny. How the World Works is legit one of my favorite songs.
Burning (2018)
Nothing against Parasite, which is a really good movie, but this is the Korean mystery/psychological thriller/drama that should have got all of the attention. The three member main cast is so good and totally believable and while you never fully sense where it’s going, in the end you realize that it turned out the only way it could have.
Chime (2024)
I just spent a bunch of words on this so I don’t need to go on here, but Kurosawa is a master and his canvas is exactly the kind of films I adore – they reward multiple watches and deep attention without giving anything away.
The Dark Knight (2008)
The ultimate expression of a superhero movie, with Heath Ledger giving the ultimate portrayal of a character that has had a lot of great performances in it.
Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)
As big a fan of Wes Anderson’s movies generally, it’s his stop-motion pictures that really blow me away. It’s the best possible combination of artist and medium. And Clooney is totally perfect here, playing off his public identity and charm.
Frances Ha (2012)
A drama about becoming an adult that is both heartfelt and really funny. Gerwig’s Frances is so uncomfortable in her own skin and unsure how to get what she wants and even really what she wants out of life at all. You can feel her thinking that she needs to stop talking when she’s in the middle of saying something that is coming out wrong but she just…can’t….stop – a feeling I identified with perhaps a bit too well.
Game Night (2018)
Classic better-than-it-had-to-be movie that totally pays off. The one on this list that you can safely recommend to all of your friends and relatives too.
The Green Knight (2021)
A fantasy tale that is really a deep dive into silly meaningless questions like what kind of person you want to be and how you define yourself to yourself. And fantastic fantasy trappings on top of it. A legitimate epic that could be told around campfires.
Happy Death Day (2017)
Every now and then a movie comes along that feels like it was made expressly and personally for me. I love love love love this movie.
Hereditary (2018)
My favorite horror movie, and as you all know I am a huge fan of the genre. This avoids all the tropes that drive me nuts and pays off perfectly. As a side personal note, this is one of only two movies I’ve watched at home where when something happened (you know what) I had to pause the film and walk around just to clear my head.
Hit Man (2024)
Sexy, cool, fun.
I Saw the TV Glow (2024)
If I had my #2 and #3 from this year on the list, #1 was obviously going to make it – I certainly revise my mental rankings over time but doing so that quickly would be déclassé. So many insights in this movie! Make many many more, Jane.
In the Mood for Love (2001)
Pretty much a perfect movie.
Josie and the Pussycats (2001)
Totally jerkin!
Kill Bill Vol. 1 (2003)
Would deserve to be on the list just for the deranged fight scene against the Crazy 88s. A master at the top of his crazy violent form.
Kill List (2012)
Roughly as f****d up as Barbarian, but explained less – a pure example of a guy thrust into a situation that he thinks he understands but he really, really doesn’t. And the ending, while totally whacked out, is perfect.
Let the Right One In (2008)
The Swedish one, not the US remake, to be clear. Great concept, fantastic execution – both leads are just perfect and it really wouldn’t work otherwise.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
Impossible to leave off the list. Just an incredible achievement of what by all rights should’ve been unfilmable – and the only meaningful thing they cut was the already-questionable Tom Bombadil stuff.
Lost in Translation (2003)
Usually I want to think about what a movie means and what it’s trying to get at, but sometimes I just want to luxuriate in how I felt while watching it. I love the relationship between these two and how they quickly recognize a connection and they don’t have to explain or analyze it and, unlike virtually evert other movie ever, it doesn’t have to be romantic.
Memories of Murder (2005)
A great murder procedural and a great buddy comedy and a great study of small town Korea. I don’t know how it manages to juggle everything going on and all of the tone changes without being a mess but somehow Bong Joon Ho pulls it off.
Michael Clayton (2007)
The perfect political thriller without the politics – all back room contortions and hidden (and not-so-hidden) motivations and wheels within wheels. But it’s also the perfect work movie – Clayton is the consummate professional within his world, leading to the best quote – “I’m not the guy that you kill! I’m the guy you buy! As you so f***ing blind that you don’t even see what I am?”
Mission: Impossible – Fallout
The best episode of the best action/thriller series of the 2000s.
Ocean’s 11 (2001)
The heist movie that all other heist movies are compared to. You even have a reason to root for these guys besides their likeability – but they’re so likable! Clooney at his most debonair, Pitt at his most rakishly charming, a young cute Damon, everyone is great.
Paddington 2 (2017)
A good test for people is to ask them what they think of Paddington 2. If they haven’t seen it yet, they are to be pitied and directed to the nearest streaming service. If their face lights up and they can talk of nothing else for 20 minutes, then they are good people and you should treasure them. If they say that they didn’t like it then shoot them dead and consider it a mercy killing.
Pulse (2001)
The best ghost story I’ve seen, and it’s not really a ghost story. Kurosawa is the best.
The Raid: Redemption (2012)
My comment about Kill Bill above notwithstanding, one fight sequence isn’t enough to make a great film. But if the entire film is make up of one great fight sequence….
The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)
Either you like Wes Anderson or you don’t – if you do, this is perhaps the best most fundamental expression of his whole deal.
RRR (2022)
I love a movie that goes all-out go-for-it crazy, and nothing was more batshit out of its mind than this. I can’t say that much of the plot made sense per se but goddamn if I wasn’t into it all the damn way.
Scott Pilgrim vs the World (2010)
The other movie (one of the others perhaps?) that I love waaaaaaay more than everyone else. And the Brie Larson version of Black Sheep BANGS.
Shutter Island (2010)
Leo’s best performance and a killer whodunnit, and I love an unreliable narrative.
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse(2018)
Spider-Pig!
Zodiac (2007)
Really glad they wrapped all this up in a tidy little bow.
So first off, there is of course a level on which this movie is working that I cannot speak to. There is clearly a trans allegory happening here and given how masterful the rest of the movie is I am just going to assume that it nails that as well.
But what really spoke to me is how perfectly this gets the way in which you can really immerse yourself in something and use it to be part of your identity, especially in those early teen years when you’re just trying to figure out who you are and what you like and how to define yourself in the world.
And then having shown that so perfectly we have the first of several codas where the main character goes back after a long time and revisits the show that was so important to them back in the day and it’s completely different from how they remembered it, both because the memory was old and everything felt different and because it played such an outsized important role in their life and watching it later just inherently could never life up to that memory.
Also, obviously, I appreciated the obvious Buffy-ness of The Pink Opaque. Duh.
I appreciated Joan Schoenbrun’s first feature We’re All Going to the World’s Fair, but this is a major step forward and I’m really looking forward to what they’re going to do next.
Thanks to all two of you still reading for sticking with me through a ridiculously protracted posting schedule. I just checked and I’m actually right now up to the same number of movies at this point in 2025 as for all of 2024 so I’l try not to draw it out as long next year….
Congratulations, it’s a movie that you’ve never heard of and that’s almost impossible for you to watch! Hooray!
So I have to actually get into the technicalities here – to be able to watch this damn movie you have to go to a Japanese site (https://roadstead.io/ – it apparently has an English version now but didn’t when I rented) and rent the movie by getting a loan of its limited NFT from some rando who owns it….yeah, really, it’s an impressive series of hoops.
Normally of course I would say the hell with that, but a new movie from Kiyoshi Kurosawa (who wrote and directed my beloved Pulse and the excellent Cure) is one of the very few occasions where I would dare it, and man this was just made for me.
A man teaches a cooking class. One of his students begins to complain that he can hear a tone that sounds like a chime and is giving him messages. Events transpire
A haunting horror-esque mystery that is never actually explained; I have a theory that feels right to me, but I can’t swear to it. There are so many details – my rental lasted for a period of time not a number of views so I rewatched it a few times to see what I could pick up. Eventually I had to stop but I was still noticing new things each time.
I really wish this was more widely available because I think it’s just awesome. Rather short (45 minutes) but a complete movie, so it’s easy to get through but difficult to get a handle on. If this sounds at all interesting to you it will be worth your time to go get it and I’m pretty sure that I didn’t get any computer viruses from my experience….
First off let me just say that the space separating the top three movies this year is a flimsy and fragile thing – ask me tomorrow and this might well be #1. It took me a long time just to try to order these last movies.
Incredible star-making turns from both Glen Powell and Adria Arjona – although his career seems to have taken off much more than hers, they are both flaming-star great in this. I finished this desperate to watch more things that they were in and I very much look forward to continuing in that quest.
Linklater’s writing and direction are both top-notch here, balancing the humor of the fake hit setups with the danger of his, um, side hustle and the sexiness of their developing relationship. And boy howdy is this a sexy movie, not in a gross 15 year old way or even in a Fatal Attraction / Basic Instinct fashion.
Almost certainly the most pure fun I’ve had watching a movie in 2024. Really really great.
Just a perfect little movie. Nothing monumental, nothing that makes it stand out and make lists of the Top 100 movies of the 2000s (for example), but everything is just RIGHT.
Start with the best David Mamet script possible – sharp and witty but with heart and without some of the most egregious Mametisms that draw too much attention to themselves and take you out of the film. Then the entire cast is impeccable – William H, Macy, Sarah Jessica Parker, Charles Dunning and Patti LuPone, even Alec Baldwin is perfect as the pretty-yikes cad character.
But obviously the real key is my guy Philip Seymour Hoffman. Amazingly (or not I suppose) he plays great in a role that I’m not used to seeing him in – the shy ingenue writer who needs to figure out whether he can deal with these Hollywood crazies and what to do about this nice woman who seems interested.
It’s hardly a breakthrough or anything, but it’s just a prime example of its form. Funny and sweet and just nice.
